Hermiones Secret Obsession
by Kina Potizma
Summary: Hermione has a secret. Shes suffering from anorexia, but she doesnt see it as that. She recognizes it as a beauty and a talent. Though people are determined to get in her way. I FINNALLY UPDATED!
1. Lost

Disclaimer: blah blah blah, I don't own Harry potter, i'm just a poor American llama....

Title: Hermione's Obsession

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Hermione walked slowly down the corridor to her history of magic class, dreading what was to come. For the first time ever she was utterly unprepared for class. She didn't even have her notes from yesterday.  
Looking over to the side of her, she spotted a girls bathroom. Quickly, discreetly she slipped into the bathroom and positioned herself in front of the mirror.

"God I look terrible," she whispered, poking at invisible flesh, "I can't believe how everything's going..."

At that moment she heard someone open the door to the bathroom. Again, quietly, but quickly she slipped into the bathroom stall and sat on the toilet seat, pulling her legs up so they couldn't see her.

"This is going to be a lloooooong day," she thought...

..................................................................

The lunch bell rang and Hermione looked up from her book and sighed. Lunch used to be her favorite part of the day. A time to socialize and review her lessons. But now it was a time of stress, especially after Harry had left her.

(Flash back)

Harry approached her nervously as she walked into the great hall and asked her if she would go to some dance thing. She had accepted thinking maybe she was beautiful.

But, not to her surprise he left her about three months later. For a girl who was thinner. More gorgeous. Just someone better. And that's when it really set in. what those foolish muggle doctors called "anorexia".

It was ridiculous to her, she loved Ana. Ana was making her beautiful, thin, and wanted.

She was weak though, the week Harry had ended it she had slacked off. She had been eating candy and other sweets, but now she knew she couldn't do that. To eat was evil. Food had betrayed her. Ana would never betray her...

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Hermione entered the great hall and walked slowly over to their usual table. Sitting down she glanced at Harry who was stuffing his mouth with some meaty sandwich.

Disgusting

She glanced at Ron who was talking to dean while chewing a chicken leg.

She felt sick

She stood up, ignoring harry's glances and Rons muffled question. She strode from the hall to the dormitories, deciding to "take the day off"

When she entered her dormitory she was surprised to see that she had gotten a letter from someone, who it was she couldn't imagine. She walked slowly over to the bed and set down her bag, picking up the note, she saw who it was from.

Viktor 

Flash back

"Ermion ninny... I think wer' better being friends..."

"great, "she thought, "now I have to hear him brag about a new girlfriend most likely..."

she threw herself onto her bed, dropping the envelope on the floor, and fell asleep almost immediately.

.........................................

More coming soon! plz review!


	2. Imperfect, again

Disclaimer: "Must we go through this EVERY TIME!! sigh I don't own harry potter, or any of the charactors except for the ones used in dream sequences and in any instances involving pudding and squrriel pellets.   
(jK, none of that's in the story)   
**NOW ON! ON TO THE AMAZING CHAPTER TWO!**

Disclaimer: "Must we go through this EVERY TIME!! sigh I don't own Harry potter, or any of the characters except for the ones used in dream sequences and in any instances involving pudding and squirrel pellets.   
(JK, none of that's in the story)   
NOW ON! ON TO THE AMAZING CHAPTER TWO! 

………………………. 

Hermione woke a few hours later. The room around her was dark, but empty. She glanced at her clock that sat beside her bed. 

" Eight o'clock! PM or AM??" she thought as she sat up tiredly. The room began to spin and she closed her eyes. 

A few seconds later she heard the door began to creak, her eyes snapped open as she tried to make herself look like she'd been up for a little while. 

"Hermione? Hermione are you in here?" came Ginny's voice. 

Hermione realized the curtains of her bed that faced the door were closed. She debated whether or not to get herself up, but initially decided against it. 

"Hermione, Harry and Ron are looking for you; they thought you might have been sick all day so after lessons they went to madam pomphrey and…" 

Ginny was cut short as Hermione ran around the side of the bed, grabbed a brush to attack her hair, nearly broke her own arm snatching for her school bag, and ran out the door. 

Ginny felt like a tornado had just hit her; she walked quickly after Hermione who was standing in the common room asking Ron and Harry if they'd really gone to the nurse. 

"No! We didn't what Ginny was supposed to say was that we were worried about you and we were going to go to the nurse if you didn't get up soon! You've been sleeping all day you missed all your lessons and don't you think the teachers like McGonagall and others would notice that you weren't at the meals and…" 

Hermione tuned him out. 

"how could I be so irresponsible! I should have gone to my lessons, screw Viktor and all of them; did I really risk all i've earned for my own feelings?" 

Harry had noticed the change in her face. He reached out, placing his hand on her arm. She filched without meaning to and looked into his eyes. 

She still missed him. She hated herself for still missing him. She hated herself for wanting him to miss her too. She hated herself period. 

And now he was going to think she was a terrible student and person for missing all those lessons today, and the homework! What was she going to do? She could see it in his eyes; he thought she was a terrible person. 

"Hermione stop looking at me like you're a deer in headlights, go see madam pomphrey and TELL her you were sick. She'll let you lie down or something and then you'll be excused!" 

"Yeah, sure, I'll do that. Thanks…" she said blankly. 

………… 

Ok, I want to write more, so there probably be a chapter up later on tonight.


	3. the second obsession

Wow, im so far behind…sorry about the delay, I was grounded and lazy, not a good combonation…  
**IF YOU WROTE A REVIEW READ THIS:  
**Ana is the nickname for anorexia. It was not created by one person on fan fiction. There are sites online called pro-ana (meaning pro-anorexia). Having suffered from anorexia I know about these sites and hence I used the name ana.  
ok, on to the story (it gets juicy here)

Hermione strode down the corridor, her head buzzing. Having just returned from a stressful session at the hospital wing she was drained. She stopped suddenly right in the middle of the corridor. She had felt something in the pocket of her robes. A small piece of paper.  
She quickly took it out and found it to be the note vicktor had sent her. Her breath stopped in her throat. She slowly unfolded it.

Dear Hermione

I was just writing to check up on you. We haven't talked in a long time. How are you? I know it must be weird to hear from me so late, but I was worried. I do still care about you, I just didn't feel like we could go together any longer. Please forgive.  
Vicktor

She couldn't believe it. After all this time, after everything she had been through all he had to say was "hello, how are you". she really was a pathetic excuse for a human being. She was 15 and she couldn't keep a boyfriend. She hated herself more and more.

And then it happened. She felt, strange. The stress within her was too much; she had to get rid of the pain. She looked down at her arms…huge, disgusting slabs of fat to her.. She knew what she had to do…

Harry walked slowly toward her, holding her school bag. She could not fathom why he would be coming towards her on a Saturday morning…with her bag…..

"Hermione, I know you don't like me very much right now but I am worried about you."

She stared blankly as he pulled out a small bag with a protractor and some razors in it.

"Hermione, I want to see your arms…"

(Ok, well I have a project to do this weekend and my aunt works at the library so ill be updating tomorrow, or maybe even later today if I am bored.)


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